Mad Respect for the Mommas, Single Mommas, Twin Mommas…especially Sarah! #twinslife

Tonight was all hands on deck. Yes…it was time for the game face. I pulled out the face paint, got in three point stance, and was ready to roll.

Game time was 5pm…quitting time at work…game time at home. Sarah was already two steps out the door when I rolled up into the Rettew Ponderosa. Four nights in a row of non-stop feeding and late night shenanigans was the catalyst for the much needed escape.

It is the monthly book club for Sarah which resulted in a natural disaster for Daddy duty. It was the Tuesday after we came home from the hospital and I thought I was man enough to handle the task. That night was full of twin shenanigans, Rosebud shenanigans, and inflated manly ego thinking he needed to prove himself. As Rosebud walked out of the bathroom with a crying panic from not making it to the toilet, I was in knee deep in twins screaming demanding a bottle. Three kids demanding immediate attention, all with tears is enough to make a 43 year old man almost drop the F-bomb in front of his five year old.

This time…yes, this time was different. Well…so I thought. As Sarah cruised out the door with book club in mind and wine on the menu, daddy had to man-up.

My brilliant idea…feed the twins immediately, load them up along with Rosebud for a walk, and then a post walk bath to wear them out! All was well until it was bath time. Yep…Rosebud was having fun on our walk but when it was time to bathe each twin then feed them a bottle…she bugged out fast. I did not blame her….she had been mommy’s helper all day.

George was up first and boy did he pitch a fit. You would think a walk would get them nice and sleepy for a dreamy bath. Oh no…the purple people eater came out. His face turned three shades of purple as I washed him in the little tub. His holy terror with the purple faced gobbled me up…I had broken a full fledge sweat! I finished quickly because Henry was in the den cutting a shine, screaming his little baby head off.

Side note…it was feeding time and daddy did not plan to well. You do not postpone a bottle for a bath, unless you want to unleash holy terror, purple people eater tantrum from the dueling twins. We needed to move quick so I could pop the bottles to please their tummies.

After getting George out of the bath, his scream escalated from a stage 10 to a stage 1000…it was full fledge meltdown. Quickly I had to dress him so I could put him down to get the next purple people eater Henry. His tantrum quickly escalated as well as I moved him into the bath. This little diva quickly let me know he was not a fan of the the nice warm water. Nope…he wanted that bottle stat.

I had Rosebud back on deck singing to George as I transitioned Henry from the bath to the changing table. Yep….new diaper and clothes for both.

SHIT….I forgot the lotion. Sarah is not going to be impressed. I forgot the smell good lotion before their clothes. No time for back tracking…it was full speed ahead. Time to spring into action…full fledge, focused execution. We needed to get both of the boys in the boppy for a two-on-one. Yep…one man, two screaming hangry babies, two bottles…one boppy…GO.

Ahh…the sound of silence. I could even hear my own thoughts again. As the bottles were being sucked down at the speed of light, I reflected…babies happy…daddy happy…now time to read books to Rosebud.

BURP! Yep…you know you love the smell of a formula burp!

Hats off to the momma’s that does this everyday of the week, especially my wife! 

BTW…this post is dedicate to my wonderful, lovely, kickass wife. I have mad respect for her skills to manage these two on a daily basis. Love that woman!

You may also like